Red Eyes
by AdamtheGojiFan
Summary: A short story of Kaidan Alenko and William Shepard right after the final attack on Cerberus. Shepard, a man who is a good mixture of paragon and renegade, finally sees what he has become when his eyes change from blue, to red. And who else to comfort him other than the Major. MShenko


Red Eyes

Kaidan unsuited after the fierce combat they witnessed on the heart of Cerberus. His muscles were aching, and he felt dried blood on his leg causing the hairs to stick to the skin. He had always hated that feeling, the sense of being unclean, or completely covered in filth. But, the Major was so proud that he, Edi, and Shepard were able to finally put an end to the sadistic faction.

Though the news of the Crucible being in the hand of the Reapers, being no thanks to The Illusive Man himself, has caused alarm for the whole crew, there was still a huge feeling of pride in it all.

They had to win this war. He had to help win this war; if not for the galaxy, then for the love of his life who had seen so much and gained so little in the process.

It was the sad truth, and Kaidan knew it. Shepard had done so much, for so many, but gained little. He offended wondered how the Commander could manage to keep it up. He was informed of his cybernetic implants, and how stress would affect how clear the scars were. But he had no idea, until recently, how painful they looked.

Shepard was always a man conviction. He knew where he stood on many levels. There were always time when he had to intimidate people into following or agreeing with him, but most of the time he was fair, and balanced. Yet, he still was. Shepard was so nice and caring towards his crew, his friends, and Kaidan most of all.

Other than a small line flowing down Shepard's jaw line, none of the cybernetic scars showed at all. That was until this last mission. Kaidan noticed how angry his lover got during all the fights. He charged into Cerberus troops without taking any notice from anyone. Slicing, punching, ramming with the butt of his gun, Shepard is an unstoppable machine when angry. Kaidan had seen it before, but not like this.

He first noticed Shepard's change in pace after learning that he had been 'brain dead' when Cerberus started the Lazarus Project. Was he a high tech VI that only thought it was Commander Shepard? He had asked Kaidan that question, and Kaidan gave an honest answer.

'You're real enough for me.'

It is true. Even if Shepard was that 'High Tech VI', he was still in love with him. Kaidan was never going to lose faith in the man no matter what happened.

But, why was the Commander so angry all of a sudden? Cerberus has been stopped, and the end of the war was approaching fast. Was it just the unbelievable stress that was overtaking him? Kaidan had tried to relieve that the other night before the attack. But it apparently had not worked.

The cybernetic scars grew, and Kaidan only noticed this once they were back on the shuttle and heading back to the _Normandy_. Now it was not just a single patch on his jaw line, but one above his right eye, and huge gashes along both sides of his cheeks. All glowing a mixture of orange and red. They were not there before the battle, and now they are.

Kaidan could always look past the scars though. The man he loved was still in there. That man is fighting like hell to win a way bigger than any of them combined. But, what caused Kaidan to take alarm were the Commander's eyes. They have been a perfect shade of blue beforehand, and now three dots had formed around his pupil that were glowing an ominous red. It was faint, but Kaidan could still see it.

Why was there such a sudden change in mood in Shepard? Why did the Cerberus Base bring this up? Shepard had seen worse. He had also been through far worse than what had just happened. Sure, Kai Leng had been a tough battle they won. But, Shepard could pull through it. He had before, and he will again.

Over the course of 20 minutes, Kaidan had taken a shower, and gotten back into his normal uniform. Considering what he had just seen, it felt nice to be able to breathe again.

The L2 made his way back to the side observation room where he spent most of his time to himself. There, he felt at peace with everything around him. He would stare out at the stars and think about just how lucky he was to have what he has. Considering where everyone else in the Galaxy was at, he was indeed a lucky man.

After several minutes of sitting on the leather couch, he felt the need to stand and move around. He thought of The Commander, and the final attack about to be launched on Earth with the combined fleets. He should feel nervous, and scared, but he did not. He felt good about their chances of winning the war.

Then, he heard the sliding doors behind him open. Kaidan turned to see who it was.

Shepard moved in like he always had. Kaidan tried to take his old stance, but could not. The lighting his Shepard's face, but the scar were glowing and his eyes were too. This was something that made him Kaidan feel slightly uneasy.

"Hey, Kaidan," said the Commander with his low voice.

Kaidan noticed how on edge he looked when he moved into the lighting.

"Hey, Shepard," he said trying to sound preppy. "That was hell back there. Glad you made it out in one piece."

Shepard laughed slightly then moved back for the door. He pressed a button and shut it.

"What's up," asked Kaidan moving to get closer to the other man.

Shepard looked away from the major, and pulled back. He then sighed heavily.

"Shepard," Kaidan stated in a husky voice. "It's almost over. You'll be okay."

"Kaidan," began Shepard. "Just look at me. They were never this bad before."

"The scars," asked the Biotic while he moved to close the distance.

"Kaidan, please," begged Shepard. "Chakwas warned me about these. I knew what would happen if I let my anger get too far ahead of me." He paused and took another deep breath. "I can deal with the scars, sure, but look at my eyes!"

Kaidan touched Shepard's face slightly. He wanted to let the man know that, no matter what, he was still loved.

"I knew that taking Cerberus on would bring up a lot of anger in me, but so much that this happened?" Shepard again pointed to his face, and pushed Kaidan's hand away.

This is true. Kaidan always knew that Shepard was a man of integrity. He was a man that would see every option. But, once in a while, he would reach a boiling point. Shepard would become something to fear, not love and respect. The Major could always look past it easily, knowing that the loving person was still always there. Most of the crew knew this as well. But, how else could Kaidan put it? When Shepard got mad, he got mad.

"I mean, it was never this bad before, was it?"

Kaidan gave his answer sincerely, "No. But I don't care if you have them or not. It's…"

"What it is," interrupted Shepard. He then sighed, and looked back into Kaidan's eyes.

Kaidan could not deny that the Commander's eyes were slightly frightening. But, underneath them, he knew it was the same Shepard as before. He then closed the distance, wrapped his arms around the soldier, and got him in a tight embrace.

For a while, Shepard did not return the affection, but finally he caved in. His arms wrapped around the upper shoulders of the Sentinel. They stood there for several minutes, enjoying the comfort of each other, and the warmth each had.

Shepard broke away first, and he had a smile on his face.

"What would I do without you, Major," he asked with the smile not fading.

Kaidan answered with, "You'd have Garrus to lean on."

The Commander laughed slightly.

"That's a good one." He then moved back for the door where he came from. "Thank you, Kaidan."

Kaidan smiled and crossed his arms.

"I love you, Shepard."

The words escaped his mouth before he had time to think on them. He thought that he would feel ashamed, but instead he felt happy that it was now off his chest. Kaidan had been holding it in for so long now, but was so afraid to say anything that he never did. He had felt that way since the SR-1, and now it was five years later. Everything was finally falling into place for him. Kaidan had what he always wanted. Someone to live for, even love.


End file.
